Have you realised , some fights feel like, okay, do-or-die kind of. When you are in sympathetic dominance, in fight-or-flight mode, you don’t think twice. If there is no emotional investment in the fight or the challenge, you just move forward without thinking about the result or anything. It won’t feel very tough to deal with your problems.

But certain fights feel tough to face, tough to deal with. Maybe because of the emotional investment, the attachment, the strings still attached, not being able to cut them down properly — that makes it difficult to take a decision before going into fight mode. Because before you act, you have to mentally prepare yourself.

So the fight, or whatever decision you take, happens in two phases. One, your mind should be prepared. Then, the act. Think and then act.

Convincing the mind is the difficult part. I think facing problems, solving problems, dealing with issues and challenges — whatever it may be — is easier compared to convincing your own mind to get ready for it.

When the mind is convinced, it feels so easy to act. But when you find it difficult to convince your mind, it means you haven’t resolved something within. It is like unresolved emotions are still there. You are not ready to face it. You haven’t completed the issue inside yourself.

And that makes it too difficult to go into fight mode.

When some people say, “I just want to sit. I don’t want to deal with it right now. I just want to relax. I am not ready. Let me handle it later,” people call it excuses.

But I don’t think it is an excuse to the outside world. It is an excuse to yourself — or rather, a pause inside — because you haven’t resolved what you need to resolve. You still don’t know within yourself. It is an inner communication.

So when you feel like, “I need some time,” it is time you are taking with yourself rather than from the outside world.

And that is important.

Because before acting — in every small or big challenge — you need to have a conversation with yourself. You need to convince yourself. That is the biggest part.

Why is it the biggest part?

Because if there is emotional investment, it becomes so difficult to convince yourself.

And that is painful.

The most hurting part is the moment you realise this —

that you have not closed or completed that chapter yet,

even though you thought it was over.